Thursday, April 28, 2011

Sorry in advance

I had today/tonight's blog planned out in my head all day, and it was supposed to be a funny little blog for all of you. Hell especially after tonight's amazing Ustream with my hilarious roommates. I had a great night, I should be writing a great and happy blog!

But alcohol IS a depressant and, at the moment, I'm not feeling incredibly happy. So here's my unhappy, drunk rant.

To any guy who has ever bitched about women playing mind games with them: Fuck. You. You do the same shit to us. And honestly? I, personally, am sick of being toyed with.

Here's the thing: I am 23 years old. I am young. I want to have fun. If you only want to have fun with me, just fucking say you only want to have fun with me. Don't make me think this is going to go somewhere if it's not. I am perfectly fine with that! Don't tell me all the cutesy shit that makes me think you want to be with me if you don't. I'd rather know than sit here wasting my time waiting on you.

I have my whole 20s left to live, these are the BEST YEARS OF MY LIFE (so "they" say) and I will be goddamned if I waste another two years on a person only to find out they don't think I'm the one for them! ESPECIALLY if they KNEW I wasn't the one for them months in advance! That's a long time, that's TWO YEARS down the drain, and I don't want to waste anymore unnecessary time. If you want to be with me then fucking say it, and if you don't then fucking say that too.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Go me!

I don't know why, but I've always been really bad at talking to people I like.  Especially in person but, oddly enough for me, just as bad over the Internet or text.  Even if I know the person has shown an interest in me too if they don't message me for a while I start to get all "Oh I'm probably annoying them/they're busy so I'll just wait for them to talk to me!"

This is funny because, from what I've learned by talking to guys I've done this to before, it turns into this cycle of them thinking the same thing of me.  Then them saying years later, "Yeah I always liked you but you never talked to me so I thought I was bothering you."

But, even knowing that, I still fail miserably at it.

Yesterday I built a bookshelf for my room!  Actually, I had bought said bookshelf back in, uhhhh, September or October and just had never bothered to put it together.  I felt so productive, it was great, and it looks great!  Now I just have to get all the random shit off the floor and make it look presentable before my dad gets into town this weekend.  I'm going to try and talk him into buying me a bigger dresser.  I have so many clothes (and such a tiny ass dresser) that I'm out of places to put them all!

In other news, I stopped going to the gym back in October or November.  Whenever it got cold and I was like "fuck that" to walking there, then turned into a huge fatass (not really).  I started up just this month again.  Lemme tell ya, I am so effing out of shape it's ridiculous.  13 minutes on the treadmill, I wasn't even RUNNING, and I thought I was gonna die.  Good job body!

If there's a zombie apocalypse anytime soon I am so fucked, I can't even get Rule #1 down!

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Vacation Days, or lack thereof.

So much has changed within the past month.  April 2011 has been absolutely ridiculous.  My boyfriend (now ex) and I both realized that it wasn't really going anywhere and we were too different to make it work.  It's been sorta mutual...I fought it the first time before realizing what he had told me was true and now he's kind of fighting it.  Hopefully we can end up as friends still.

Kind of wishing I hadn't taken the trip to Florida.  4.5 out of 10 vacation days gone and there are SO many places I want to go now!

I have my best friend's bridal shower Saturday, July 23rd with a decorating party on the 22nd and with Spirit Airlines' flight times I'd have to fly in on that Thursday or hope the decorating party would be after 4pm on Friday.

So there's another two days gone, now I'm down to 3.5.  Then there's her wedding on Saturday, September 10th (get it? 9-10-11 harharhar) so I gotta fly there on Thursday again probably, I don't know when the bachelorette party is, if it's that Friday I might just fly in Friday but I bet it's not.  Ugh plus I want to see my favorite hairdresser and get her to do something with this unmanageable mess before the wedding!  So there's another two days gone (Also yeah I get to fly back to Chicago on the 10th anniversary of 9-11, that's not fucking scary or anything) and now I'm down to 1.5.

But then I get 7 personal days to use.  I guess I need to ask if I can just use those like a singular vacation day and take some 3 day weekend vacays.  I know one of those is going to be for the Friday of Lollapalooza more than likely.  And my one roommate just asked me about Blizzcon which is also on a Friday so that would be 2 days I'd  need. AUGH. NOT ENOUGH TIME!

Luckily I am planning a very, very awesome vacation for Memorial Day weekend that will not having me miss any work!

Sunday, April 24, 2011


One day I will write a book, my book; the book so many people tell me I should write.

But then..I'm not sure what all would be in this book.  I'm not very good at keeping track of funny moments in my life enough that I could form coherent chapters out of them.  I'm not David Sedaris, Celia Rivenbark or even Chelsea Handler, although I most certainly wish I was.  I know my life has had moments similar in hilarity to the ones they've written, it's just a manner of putting it all together and compiling it.

I mean I'm only 23, should I even really have enough to write a book at this point.

But trust me someday, blog, I will do it.  I will write my book of hilarity of my life.  And people will laugh.

Because, dammit, I am funny.  And one day you'll be reading my book.

Saturday, April 16, 2011


Last night was supposed to be a relaxing evening with the boyfriend.  We were going to go out for dinner dinner and then watch a movie and drink beer at home till we fell asleep, which would probably be around midnight for me.

But then, while I was getting ready at my apartment, he texts me that his friend has VIP access at a club downtown for the night and we should join. So, never one to pass up feeling like I'm fancy upper class, I got all prettied up to go to the club.

We ended up getting to the club around midnight, after a delicious meal of Taco Bell and beer back at the boyfriend's apartment. We had originally been told there was a $20 cover regardless of VIP status but once we told the bouncer (who did a triple take between my ID and my face since it's an out of state ID and the picture is 8 years old. I REALLY need to get a new ID) that we were meeting people who knew DJ whoever they just let us on in.

VIP was awesome!  We had this whole section to our group of people and a bucket of ice lit up by LEDs and pitchers of all sorts of mixers (Coke, cranberry, OJ, etc) as well as bottles of Grey Goose, Patron, and Jameson.  Whiskey and Coke was my drink of choice for the night and I was downing them awful fast.

Unfortunately, about 15 minutes into dancing, the lights came on.  Really?  Enclave closes at 1:30am on a Friday night?  We had been there before (Charlie Sheen after party!) on a Sunday and I swear we were there past 2am.

They were really pushy about getting everyone out.  We scooted back to the VIP section to try and drink up as much of the free booze (that someone else paid $2k for) as we could.  I took a shot of the Patron, because I can't let good tequila go to waste, but there was still almost half a bottle of it.  As we were walking out I lamented the fact that a paid for bottle of Patron was going to waste, when I heard another guy from our VIP group behind me exclaim that it was definitely not going to waste.  I turn around and he shows me that he's carrying the bottle out in his coat.

Got outside and we started doing more shots of tequila, straight from the bottle, in the parking lot of the club.

So classy.

Needless to say I don't remember much else of the night, but I'm definitely paying for it today.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Things I Love - My Pocket Knife

This is my Victorinox Swiss Army Knife (or as I call it, just my pocket knife).

It's one of the best things I own, and I have it with me almost all the time.  I grew up with my dad ALWAYS having a pocket knife on him and it was such a handy little thing.

When I moved away from home to go to college I found myself in positions where a pocket knife would've come in handy, but for some strange reason I was too lazy to actually go and get one for myself.

A few years ago I was recognized by my old job for having worked there 5 years. As thanks they gave me a little catalog of stuff I could pick from as a gift, I couldn't help but choose this little guy.

It's awesome and I love it. I think it's something everyone should have.

I mean, just look at all the stuff it has!

You get scissors!  Broke a nail and now it looks all wonky?  Got a runaway string on your shirt? Tag on your new pair of sunglasses? Something in that plastic packaging that is harder than shit to open? Long nose hairs? No worries!  You have a fucking pocket knife!

You also get a knife!  I mean what would a pocket knife be without a knife?!  The one on mine was hella sharp at first and I almost seriously hurt myself at one point, these aren't something to just fuck around with.  With the knife you get an increased sense of security!  I hold it in my hand sometimes, knife out, when walking home alone in the dark. Yeah, that'll keep those nasty muggers away!

The knife is also useful for cutting things and opening packaging (and cleaning your nails if you're careful).  It's my go to item when I get a new box in from Amazon!

Below the knife you'll see the file and flat head screwdriver!  Yeah that little weird squared off part is the screwdriver.  I don't really use it that much as most of the screws I have that need screwing are much smaller than that, but I've tried it before on bigger screws and it works pretty well!  You can also use the screwdriver part to clean your nails if you're not risky enough to use the knife.

The file is pretty self-explanatory. I don't have many things to file with a file, except my nails, and since I manage to break my nails so often it comes in handy quite a bit.

You also get a reusable toothpick and a pair of tweezers!  To be honest, I don't use these two very much.  I'm not much of a toothpick user to begin with.  I don't know if it shows well in that picture but my toothpick is bent at the bottom since I tried to use it to open my Xbox 360 case (gotta stick something through little holes to pop the case open) and it wasn't really strong enough for that and I bent it a bit.

The tweezers are good for splinters probably some other things that I can't think of, but I don't care for them when it comes to plucking my eyebrows.  I carry another pair of tweezers on me at all times for that purpose though.  I guess I'm just picky!

I know mine is just the basic, everyday model, but they have some really fancy ones with can and bottle openers and corkscrews and Philips head screwdrivers and saws and other awesome shit.  You can see all the different awesome ones here.  Some of them even come in fancy colors and designs!

I mean, how could you NOT want one of these?

Thursday, April 14, 2011

An addendum to the previous post about sleep

So last night, like all other weeknights, I told myself I was going to go to bed early (before 11pm).  Instead I got to sleep somewhere closer to 1am last night.

My boyfriend was going to the Chicago Bulls game last night and decided that parking in my neighborhood and taking the bus down the street from me to the United Center was the fastest option.

Since I was sure he would be drinking it seemed like I'd have to wait up for him since he doesn't have spare keys to my place.  Around 11pm I texted him if he was going to be coming over, yes he was, and then told him I'd leave my keys in the mailbox.

"Are you going to sleep?"

Well...yeah.  It's 11:30pm and I've been complaining about not sleeping enough. 

So I manage to fall asleep...and then, of course, my phone rings at 12:30am.


"Hey, I'm downstairs come let me in."

"...the keys are in the mailbox."

"Oh, oh yeah."

He comes in, apologizes, gets ready for bed and I attempt to fall back asleep.  Then I realize he's been out of the room for a while, and I start hoping he's not sleeping on the couch or something because he thinks I'm mad at him.

I get up and see lights from the kitchen, so I head that way.  In the kitchen I find the fridge wide open and my boyfriend standing in the pantry, in his boxers, eating sliced cheese.

After I stop laughing I ask him what he's doing just standing in the pantry.

"Making grilled cheese."

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Why.. I so bad at getting enough sleep?!

I've been trying to go to sleep early enough that I'm not tired when I wake up in the morning.

Unfortunately I keep managing to go to bed early enough and then lay there for a while before actually getting to sleep. I can feel tired all day long but then the minute I lay down my mind starts working a mile a minute. Augh, so frustrating!

Hopefully, since I've started going to the gym again (yeah I stopped, excuse? too cold outside to walk there!), I'll start being able to sleep at a decent time and when I actually WANT to.

In other news, I think I've been using the word "awesome" too much as I found myself typing "awfice" instead of "office" to a friend over IM recently.